4 Tips On Handling Conflict During Divorce

Divorce proceedings often have a significant impact on both the personal and financial well-being of the parties involved. When there is so much at stake, it is only natural that the process can become overwhelmed with unnecessary conflict. Arguing almost never results in a positive outcome and typically involves various statements or actions that can have a profoundly negative impact on the case, so appropriately handling conflict during divorce should be a top priority.

4 Tips on Handling Conflict During Divorce:

1. Create a Support System. Be aware of friends and family who will provide positive support during the divorce process. Even when friends and family are not available, divorcing parties do not have to go through the process alone. Join a support group or forum online. Just interacting with others in similar situations can be a great help when coping with the dramatic changes that come with divorce. Simply having others to talk to can decrease conflict during divorce and help avoid lashing out at an ex.
2. Skip the Blame Game. Yes, your ex did things that you didn’t like. They may have hurt you and others. You could probably list out each offense one by one with all the accompanying details. But is it necessary? Playing the blame game very rarely helps the situation. Skip it entirely whenever possible. It goes a long way towards managing the conflict.
3. Pick Your Battles. If you would like to finalize the divorce as soon as possible, remember that fighting over minor issues and problems can often take just as long or longer than the tense negotiations over the “big” issues. In fact, fighting tooth and nail over every, little thing can make proceedings drag on for months or even years in some cases. Set aside some time to sit down and determine what is important to you. Those are the only issues you should be willing to go into battle for – and only those. Don’t make every issue a non-negotiable issue. Let the minor battles go and avoid the unnecessary divorce litigation.
4. Come Up With a Plan. Consider life after divorce and come up with a plan. This can drastically decrease the amount of stress during the divorce proceedings, and since stress can easily lead to unnecessary conflict, you’ll find it an effective way to smooth potentially troubled waters.

Getting divorced in California can be complicated.  Download our free eBook, 18 Important Things to Know About California Divorce to educate yourself on the process.  

Gerald A. Maggio is an experienced Orange County divorce and family law attorney and family law attorney located in Irvine, California, serving the Orange County and Riverside areas. Mr. Maggio assists clients with legal issues including divorce, legal separation, divorce mediation, child custody, prenuptial agreements, stepparent adoptions, and other family law issues. Mr. Maggio has practiced law in California since 1999, and founded The Maggio Law Firm in 2005, focusing exclusively on divorce and family law matters.