Posted by: Gerald Maggio
Those of a certain generation may recall Woody Allen’s famous line in his Oscar-winning film Annie Hall: “A relationship, I think, is like a shark. You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.”
The “dead shark” phenomenon can happen to any relationship, of course, including those within a domestic partnership. Ending a domestic partnership in California, however, has some specific requirements of which those wishing to terminate their legal bond should be aware.
Whether between a man and a woman or a same-sex couple, a domestic partnership can be ended in two ways. The first is by a Notice of Termination of Domestic Partnership filed with the California Secretary of State. The second is through the Superior Court. Both of these options are fraught with their own potential pitfalls, not least of which because not every domestic partnership termination is eligible to be filed with the Secretary of State. To qualify couples interested in this route, the office of the California Secretary of State provides a 13-point checklist with such questions as whether or not children were born, will be born or were adopted during the course of the relationship. Likewise, the form asks how much debt was mutually accrued (it can’t exceed more than $6,000) and how much community property is owned (must be less than $38,000).
Clearly, it gets complicated quickly, which is why many of these types of separations often end up in California Superior Court. This could be a good thing as it gives you the right to a court hearing in front of a judge. When filing a Notice of Termination of Domestic Partnership, there is no hearing. Moreover, you forfeit the ability to have a new hearing or the right to appeal whatever decision is rendered to a higher court. In court, however, you also have the right to an attorney. This is where we can help expedite an amicable end to your domestic partnership and navigate you to a satisfactory settlement. Then, no longer burdened by the “dead shark,” you are legally free to pursue the other fish in the sea.
To learn more about Irvine divorce lawyer, Gerald Maggio visit http://www.maggiolawfirm.com/.
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Gone are the days when one’s personal life was, well, personal. Thanks to the explosion of Facebook, Twitter, texting and other forms of social media, it is easy for folks to broadcast anything and everything about their lives — no matter how mundane — for all the world to read and see.
However, anyone going through a divorce or involved in a marriage that is clearly on its last legs is best served putting the reins on such activity. Venting about the soon to be ex should probably be limited to a conversation with a trusted confidant, preferably in person.
A recent survey of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers says that 81 percent of the nation’s top divorce attorneys state they have seen an increase in the number of cases using social networking as evidence over the last five years. Not surprisingly, Facebook, which is wildly popular across the globe, leads the way in producing divorce evidence. It was cited as the top divorce evidence source 61 percent of the time.
What this means if a man is going through a divorce, he should not post photos of him and his buddies in a club surrounded by scantily clad women with a post that says something to the effect of, “Out on the town, no wife, no kids, the way my life was meant to be.” Women, of course, also should keep the level of discretion as high as possible, no matter how bitter they are about the ex-husband in waiting.
Anyone who thinks antics that could be deemed as bawdy or showing a lack of character or self-control will not be used as evidence in the courtroom is way off base. In fact, when it comes to deciding alimony, child support and visitation rights, bank on social media activity coming up during a hearing.
“You’re finding information that you just never got in the normal discovery process — ever,” said Denver attorney Leslie Matthews recently.”People are just blabbing all over Facebook. People don’t yet quite connect what they’re saying in their divorce cases is completely different from what they’re saying in Facebook. It doesn’t even occur to them that they’d be found out.”
Former AAML president Linda Lea Viken agreed.
“(We’ve told) our clients when they come in, ‘I want to see your Facebook page,’ Viken said.’I want you to remember that the judge can read that stuff, so never write anything you don’t want the judge to hear.’
“It’s all pretty good evidence… the judges don’t really have any problems letting it in.”
Besides the social sites, bear in mind your cell phone could be the bane of your existence during divorce proceedings. The new Apple iPhone 4s has a “Find My Friends” application. A spouse is able to load you and other friends on their phone and see where you are on a map. So if you say you’re at a Ducks or an Angels game, but are instead at an address in San Clemente, home to someone who just happens to be a prominent Facebook friend, that relationship will be inspected.
All in all, anyone in the middle of a divorce should keep social media activity as vanilla as possible. Of course, avoiding it altogether until everything is done is the best way to go.
Renee Cary writes for Irvine divorce attorney, Gerald Maggio of The Maggio Law Firm. To learn more about Irvine divorce lawyer, Gerald Maggio visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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A new book The Longevity Project sheds light on many interesting aspects of how to live a long life and those people who end up the healthiest and happiest. Amongst many other topics, it discusses marriage and divorce. Staying married just for the children is not a good idea when the home environment is clearly troubled, they noted.
A home environment where parents are always in arguments, hiding things from each other, and taking sides with the children can have worse effects on a child’s long-term health than if they were to get divorced. A divorce blogger, Mandy Walker, wrote that, “…the Longevity Study reinforces the importance of putting the best interests of your children first when divorcing. There are some that will argue putting their needs first means not divorcing, period. But the reality is that life is more complicated than that, and divorces happen and will continue to happen.”
Divorce mediation can create a more stable way to break up the marriage and create a tailored solution that benefits the kids and the couple. Within a handful of sessions, the adults can discuss what their interests are for the division of assets, any property, and the parenting agreement. This is in stark contrast to a litigated divorce where a judge will decide everything and the process can take up to a year with a lot more costs.
As the blogger said, “…we can make significant improvements to how children weather the divorce of their parents by normalizing divorce.” Mediation allows the dissolution to happen in an amicable way. With each spouse’s input they will be able to more actively have a hand in the parenting agreement and learn more about the collaborative parenting process.
The divorce mediator is a neutral party, so he or she will facilitate the discussion and move it forward when there is a roadblock. The process shows each parent how they can take part in their child’s education and health care decisions, amongst other things. Mediation helps each parent find a way to be civil and cooperative, which can have great effects on how they carry themselves post-divorce.
Mandy Walker notes that, “…people who can face the end of their marriage as a learning opportunity can have the resilience and capacity to reinvent themselves.” Mediation can help a couple consider issues they might have never thought about, increase awareness of what is a fair settlement, and help them start a better chapter of their lives.
Renee Cary writes for Orange County divorce mediation lawyer, Gerald Maggio of The Maggio Law Firm. To learn more about Orange County divorce mediation attorney, Gerald Maggio visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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There are more than 60,000 cases of past due child support in Orange County, which is equal to more than 50 percent of child support cases being overdue, according to the California Department of Child Support Services. Divorced parents should know that child support laws still apply even when one of the parents moves out of the state. Federal laws mandate cooperation between the states, so it is only a matter of time before these issues will catch up with a person who is trying to evade paying court-ordered child support.
Some parents battle with the scenario of their ex always paying late or never the full amount.
What is sad is that some exes do this to spite their ex-wife or ex-husband, but it really hurts the child. In turn, millions of kids are not receiving the support that helps them live a happier, healthier life. Before things get out of hand, there are enforcement methods to make every effort to get an ex to pay. Custodial parents should not just give up, and child support attorneys can help to make sure your child support order is followed. Courts can also require an obligor to pay one year of child support up front. Your ex must show proof of the deposit. This child support “security deposit” will get put into an interest-bearing account and withdrawals can only happen with court authorization.
One of the easiest ways to ensure child support is paid for is through wage assignment. The employer of the obligor can be served an earnings assignment order, which means that the child support will be automatically deducted from the ex’s earnings. These orders also show that the ex must notify you about a change of employment, and the new employer’s contact info, within 10 days of being on a new job.
A judgment lien can also get assessed on your ex’s real property if they owe past due child support. The lien is recorded with an Abstract of Support Judgment. Then, when the debtor tries to sell the property or get a loan from the asset with the lien, he or she will be forced to pay it off. Most lenders and purchasers of this property will be unable to proceed when there is a lien on the property, so this effective enforcement method should be reviewed.
A custodial parent can also enforce child support payments through a writ of execution. A county sheriff, marshal, or registered process server will serve the obligor with the writ of execution. This will seize the funds, real or tangible personal property, or sell the real or tangible personal property and deliver to proceeds to the custodial parent.
Custodial parents should know that timely action is needed to get the child support you are due. Contempt proceedings can be held to enforce the child support order or judgment. Every month where your ex has not paid in full can be punished as separate count. And they can be responsible for paying the custodial parent’s legal costs due to the enforcement proceedings.
Renee Cary writes for Irvine divorce attorney, Gerald Maggio of The Maggio Law Firm. To learn more about Irvine divorce lawyer, Gerald Maggio visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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Posted by: Gerald Maggio
Current California divorce laws will grant spousal support to a husband or wife when there is a significant difference in income. Temporary spousal support can be granted to help during a transition, or if the marriage lasted longer than 10 years permanent spousal support can be established. Currently, one of the exceptions to this rule is if your soon-to-be ex tried to murder you. Victims rights advocates say this does not go far enough. A recent bill ¨C AB1522 ¨C would extend this exception to spouses who are convicted of other violent sexual felonies.
“Victims of violent sex crimes already suffer physical trauma, fear, and an assault on their privacy and dignity,” said Assemblywoman Toni Atkins, D-San Diego, who recently introduced the bill. “To require them also to pay their abuser alimony or to give them a share of their pension or household goods is cruel and makes a mockery of the intent behind the laws governing the fair division of assets in a divorce.”
A victim of marital rape, sodomy, and forced oral copulation urged lawmakers to make this change in the divorce and spousal support laws. Crystal Harris was ordered to pay $1,000 a month before her husband Shawn Harris was convicted and sent to state prison for six years. The San Diego Superior Court judge considered the domestic violence when figuring the spousal support and reduced her obligation from $3,000 to $1,000. Crystal had a financial consultant job whereas her husband had been out of work for several years when their 12-year marriage ended. She was also ordered to pay $47,000 of the $100,000 legal fees from the divorce proceedings. Crystal felt victimized again when she was ordered to pay this even though he had committed three serious felonies.
Since Shawn is in prison, he does not receive spousal support but when he gets out, he could currently ask the courts for spousal support unless AB1522 passes. AB1522 would also allow the injured spouse to not pay the legal and attorney fees the convicted spouse owes in any divorce proceedings. This would make a big difference throughout all of California for victims of spousal assault and sex crimes.
Victims should contact a divorce and domestic violence attorney that can promptly and effectively uphold your rights when a situation occurs that harms you or the children. An experienced attorney can be your ally to help with legal and safety concerns in these times of need.
Renee Cary writes for Irvine divorce attorney, Gerald Maggio of The Maggio Law Firm. To learn more about Irvine divorce lawyer, Gerald Maggio visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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Relationships are established much quicker in our hyper social media age. It used to be that relationships evolved over months but with technology – whether texting, social media, or email communication – everything happens at a rapid pace. For marriages that are on the rocks, a spouse can rekindle or find a new love and intensify the bonds rapidly.
A recent article in the Huffington Post highlighted how, “This means more affairs, and perhaps an increased number of marriages breaking up due to technology.” When a person is having a bad day at home with a spouse, they often turn to social media to relieve their stress and get back some enjoyment. But before you start to post negative comments about your spouse or send inappropriate pictures or posts over social media, think twice. Otherwise, you could wreck the success of a fair divorce.
The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers notes that 75 percent of divorce lawyers are utilizing evidence from social media in marriage dissolutions. Use caution and restraint when posting on Facebook, Twitter, Google+, or any online technology or you could cause more trouble than your post was worth. Remember it is not social media that is causing the problem, it is your behavior that is inappropriate. Do you want to see photos of a night on the town with cocktails in the background and a post that says “thank goodness I am away from the husband and kids”? Imagine seeing this on a big screen in the courtroom for everyone to examine when it is time to decide alimony, child support, or your fair share of the child visitation rights.
Your ex’s lawyer and the judge will scrutinize these posts and be able to take them out of context. So exercise some restraint so that problems are minimized. Also be aware of the power of your cell phone. The new Apple iPhone 4s has an app “Find My Friends” that can land you in the crosshairs of a lie. A spouse can load you and other friends on their cell and see your location on a map. So when you claim to be stuck in traffic on the 405, your spouse can see in reality you are in Laguna Beach. The GPS system does not lie, and it will be hard to show that you got lost if you were truly messing around with a mistress, that happens to be a Facebook friend that lives in Laguna Beach.
So do yourself a favor and stay off all social media and exercise caution until the divorce is finalized and you want to start a new relationship. Otherwise you could jeopardize your child custody and marriage settlement because of inappropriate behavior.
Renee Cary writes for Orange County divorce attorney, Gerald Maggio of The Maggio Law Firm. To learn more about Orange County divorce lawyer, Gerald Maggio visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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Co-parenting can be a daunting endeavor. For new divorcees, managing a full-time career, expenses, and kids’ schedules can stress even the most optimistic, upbeat person. In 2012,
vow to focus on the kids and living a healthy lifestyle rather than hating the other co-parent.
The fact stands that your ex does not live up to your expectations, and probably never will, or your marriage would have lasted.
When you can lighten up your hatred toward the ex, you can be happier when you drop them off on the ex’s parenting week or weekend or during special occasions. Treat the ex almost like a business colleague so you can keep focused on the kids’ development and your sanity. A child’s self esteem grows when they can have quality time with both parents, and does not have to be a messenger between his or her parent.
Tara Fass, a family therapist, says, “To cultivate resilience in your children, try to turn down the anger on your anxiety, disappointment and rage. How you co-parent today affects generations to come and your lineage forever. The choice is yours.”
Inevitably as the kids grow and dynamics change, the parenting agreement might need to be modified. When there are valid reasons to update the agreement – extracurricular activities the child is involved in, work schedules, summer vacation – a family law attorney can help the parents revise the agreement. It is best if both parents can work out the revisions versus having to go back to a judge to decide what is fair. As Fass states, “…dissolving couples who require a judge’s assistance to co-parent are adults viewed as children in a tantrum-like frame of mind and emotion.”
Children greatly benefit from structure, smooth transitions between households, and an environment where a parent listens and truly cares about their child growing up as normal as possible. Co-parents will have their own personalities but “As long as you are both using good judgment and are acting in safe/healthy ways, then some parenting differences will actually create benefits for your child,” noted the We Can Parent Together website. “Problems with co-parenting during the infant, toddler, preschool, and elementary school years have been related to a wide variety of child problems, including problems with social adaptation, poorer preschool and school achievement, anxiety, and aggressiveness,” said the authors of “When People Parent Together”.
For many child therapists, divorce is not problematic in and of itself. It only becomes a strain on the child’s development when conflict, inadequate parenting, and unstable routines create an unhealthy childhood. If the co-parenting agreement is creating more problems than resolving them, seek the guidance of an expert family law attorney. Taking action early on will have great benefits for everyone in the family for the long term.
Renee Cary writes for Orange County divorce attorney, Gerald Maggio of The Maggio Law Firm. To learn more about Orange County divorce lawyer, Gerald Maggio visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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A recent California child custody case shows how the state is redefining who it deems a child’s parent. Typically, the courts have given custody to a child’s biological or adoptive parents. But since 2002, groundbreaking child custody cases have looked at who the child considers the parent and who is carrying out the parenting duties. The main objective is that the courts want a person who is financially supporting the children and providing for their wellbeing. As a progressive state, California child custody cases involve not only straight couples but gay couples who also provide a strong foundation for children in the middle of a divorce.
“The state has a great interest in having those who want the benefits of parenthood to take on the responsibilities and obligations that go with parenthood,” said Pacific McGeorge School of Law Professor Larry Levine in Sacramento.
In the latest case of assigning the parent child custody, a woman who did not adopt her ex-girlfriend’s kids was ruled as their parent because she provided for them monetarily, tended to them when they were sick and even volunteered at their school. Plus, she could not adopt the children as she was in the Air Force and did not want to violate the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy that was only recently lifted. Because she was carrying out the parental responsibilities and rights, she was now deemed their parent.
Child custody decisions are, therefore, looking more at who is truly functioning as the parent. Adults who do not have blood ties or adopted a child used to be classified as “legal strangers”, but if they are carrying out the role of a parent, courts will want to keep what is in the best interest of the child. A child-centered approach versus a child as property mentality is what the courts are shifting too. Who do the children rely on? Who do they think their parents are?
This can have a big impact on not only child custody, but matters of child support. The state wants to side with whom will provide the best health, education, and home environment for the child if both parties cannot agree on joint custody. The courts really take each decision on a case by case basis, as no two scenarios are exactly the same. The biggest constant is that they will rule in the best interests of the children. An experienced child custody lawyer can help the individual who seeks child custody to create an agreement that upholds what is best for the children and takes into consideration all the actions they carry out for the children.
Gerald A. Maggio is an Orange County divorce attorney, in Irvine, California. The Maggio Law Firm specializes in divorce and family law. To learn more about Orange County divorce lawyer, Gerald A. Maggio, visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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In the New Year, couples who are getting divorced and can amicably do so can utilize mediation to make the dissolution process far less contentious. This process is far more attractive than a long, drawn-out courtroom battle. Mediation not only cuts out unneeded stress, but it saves money and time. For many, it is more of a team concept of both spouses, a mediator, and a few sessions to iron out the specifics of the divorce.
A mediator will provide guidance to reach a resolution on the issues that still need to be worked out. They bring critical negotiation skills to listen to each party’s interests and concerns, and then help to find a common resolution that each person can agree to. The mediator is a neutral party, and oftentimes an attorney, so they will be able to provide you with a background of what is legally permissible. When an impasse is reached or negativity stalls progress, the mediator knows how to get the conversation back on track. For some couples this means not doing the mediation all in one day. But in two to three sessions, you can resolve all the big priorities of the dissolution.
It is important for you to know what your future needs are so that child support, spousal support, and the division of assets and debts are done to help you find as stable of a future as possible. What many people like about mediation is that it allows you to express your values and opinions. A litigated divorce, in contrast, follows a more strict formula and what some call a “one size fits all” approach. Mediation is more sensible for two adults who can be in the same room together and hash out the details. You can take into account the budgets you live with everyday and the future needs you and the kids will have. Mediators also know how to look for tax savings and alternative settlement options to increase the chances of financial stability post-divorce.
Couples who have been through a mediated divorce say that it is far better to have the two people who intimately know their finances and assets decide how to dissolve the marriage versus a judge or pair of attorneys. At the end of the mediation process, a final divorce settlement will be created and approved by the courts. Months down the road, you will thank yourself for doing mediation. The money you saved can go towards the kids, a savings or emergency fund, or establishing yourself in a new home.
Gerald A. Maggio is an Orange County divorce attorney, in Irvine, California. To learn more about Orange County divorce lawyer, Gerald A. Maggio, visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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The concepts of marriage and parenthood are vastly changing as the Millennial Generation comes of age. The Pew Research Center published a report earlier in the year showing that Millennials – people born between 1977 and 1998 – want parenthood over marriage. The survey showed 52 percent believe that being a good parent is one of their biggest goals. Marriage was only a big goal for 30 percent of people.
As these attitudes have shifted, marriage has become less of a focus. Out of wedlock babies have increased, though. Being a good parent, to Millennials, does not necessarily mean that marriage is a must. Many couples are choosing to delay marriage, live together, and break away from the social norms of their parents.
Even though marriage is delayed or not a preference, when a couple has a child it can make them refocus their priorities. Some decide to create a cohabitation agreement to help spell out their responsibilities and rights as parents and a couple. This can help protect each person and set up a framework should something happen to one of the parents. A modern-day cohabitation agreement includes:
each person’s parental rights and duties
financial obligations
property rights
health care directives
estate planning and inheritance wishes
how long the agreement is good for and/or how it can be revised
For some Millennials, this is a good warm-up to getting married. The agreement helps safeguard each person yet also sets out how each person will be looked after. As a couple establishes more assets, property, and moves up in the work world, it can be a critical document to help them create a prenuptial agreement once it is time to get married.
Sometimes, though, the cohabitation and relationship does not work out, even if there is a child that both parents mutually love and want to care for. In these instances, the cohabitation agreement can provide a path for the main caregiver to receive child support. It will also help to modify each parent’s duties and set up a visitation agreement that both parties can agree to. For couples that can amicably agree on the parenting agreement, litigation is not necessary. A family law attorney can assist in creating a plan that the courts will approve for child custody and the visitation schedule.
Gerald A. Maggio is an Orange
County family law attorney, in Irvine, California. To learn more about Orange County family law attorney, Gerald A. Maggio, visit Maggiolawfirm.com.
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